Strategies & Supports

What is Regulation?

Regulation is the ability to shift your nervous system into a state

where you feel safe, calm, and able to engage.

Everyone regulates differently; there is no “right way.”

Regulation is not about suppressing emotions;

it’s about supporting the body through them.

What is Self-Regulation?

Self-regulation is the process of helping your body and nervous system return to a state where you feel safe, calm, and able to think clearly.

It doesn’t mean staying in control or hiding your emotions, it means recognizing what your body needs and responding with care.

Regulation can happen through movement, rest, sensory input, connection with another person, creativity, or anything that helps your system settle.

Co-Regulation

Humans regulate best through connection.

A regulated adult helps a dysregulated child (or partner or friend) by lending presence, not pressure.

Effectively co-regulate by lending your calm nervous system to another, demonstrated with a calm tone of voice with a soft facial expression, sitting beside or near, not above, validating emotion before problem-solving, and by offering choices, not giving demands or commands.

The Sensory System

The sensory system is how the brain receives and makes sense of information from inside and outside the body.

This includes the five common senses (sound, sight, touch, taste, smell) plus movement (vestibular), body awareness (proprioception), and internal body signals (interoception).

Everyone has a unique sensory profile.

Some systems are more sensitive, some less,

and understanding these differences helps us support

comfort, safety, and engagement in daily life.

Why Sensory Needs Matter

Sensory processing shapes how we experience the world

(sound, light, touch, movement, taste, smell, internal sensations).

Sensory differences are neutral.

It’s not misbehaviour, overreaction, or avoidance.

Meeting sensory needs reduces overwhelm, anxiety, and burnout.

The Nervous System

Fight (activated)
Flight (activated + anxious)
Freeze (shut down)
Fawn (appease to stay safe)
Ventral vagal (regulated, grounded, engaged)

Sensory Supports

Reduce input:

noise-canceling headphones, sunglasses, dimmer lighting, low-arousal spaces

Increase soothing input:

weighted items, deep pressure, warmth, soft fabrics, rocking, slow rhythmic movement

Increase stimulation (when shut down or under-stimulated):

chewing, upbeat music, jumping / pacing / cold water splash / movement breaks

Environment adjustments:

flexible seating, predictable routines, quiet corners, communication supports, choice and autonomy

Regulation Strategies

Movement (rocking, walking, stretching, dancing)

Breath that matches the nervous system state

(fast breath to discharge energy → slow breath to ground)

Creative expression (music, drawing, fidgeting, building)

Predictability (timers, countdowns, transitions)

Interest-based tasks to reengage the brain

Sensory tools

Frequently Asked Questions

What’s the difference between meltdown, shutdown, and tantrum?

Meltdowns are loss of control due to overwhelm; shutdowns are withdrawal when energy is depleted. Neither is manipulation. Tantrums involve a goal — meltdowns don’t. Understanding this helps you respond with compassion, not punishment.
→ Learn more: “Meltdowns, Shutdowns, and Tantrums: What’s the Difference?” (Blog post coming soon!)

What are simple sensory supports for home or work?

Noise-canceling headphones, weighted items, soft lighting, breathable fabrics, and predictable routines can make a big difference. The goal isn’t to “desensitize,” but to create comfort and safety for your system.
→ Learn more: “Creating a Sensory-Friendly Environment” (Blog post coming soon!)

What helps with executive functioning (motivation, focus, planning)?

Externalize tasks — use visual reminders, body doubling, or digital supports. Break tasks into micro-steps and start with the smallest possible action. Self-compassion fuels consistency more than pressure does.
→ Learn more: “Executive Dysfunction: Why Starting Is So Hard (and How to Help Yourself)” (Blog post coming soon!)

What’s the difference between a sensory need and a behaviour?

A sensory need comes from the nervous system; behaviour is simply how the body communicates that need. Meeting the sensory need usually reduces the behaviour on its own.

Is co-regulation only for children?

No. People of all ages regulate through relationships. Adults also benefit from supportive tone, presence, validation, and feeling safe with others.

How do I know if I’m regulated?

Signs include: slower breathing, clearer thinking, steady energy, comfort in your body, and the ability to rest or play. Regulation feels like safety.

How do I know if I’m dysregulated?

Fast breathing, overload, irritability, shutdown, panic, or difficulty thinking clearly. These aren’t failure; they’re cues your body needs support.

Where should I start if I feel overwhelmed by all the strategies?

Start small: notice one sensation in your body and try one support from either the “comfort” list (to soothe overwhelm) or “energizing” list (to lift shutdown). Tiny steps count.